흔들리지마

i didnt mean to blow my top at you today. i want so much to say how i feel but i stop myself each time thinking, whats the point? now it seems like there will never be an end to this.. i like you but i don't know what to do.

listen to me, you'll never make it through. its not in your capacity, never was.

i'm struggling to stay the same.

trying my v best not to judge.. but this is really ridiculous. you are a joke. she'll find that out eventually.

i know, you miss all of us ^^

i can't stand seeing you everyday. it pisses me off. you piss me off. its honestly not funny anymore.

its tiring to always have to be the first one to ask you out, the first to ask how're you in a msn convo, the first to call and say i miss you.. and its worse because you seem to have time for everyone else except me, well, except us. its been years. i love you but its not fair and i don't want to play this role anymore.

please save me.

listen to me say

sorry.. i spend so much time on twitter now i'm too lazy to blog. that picture was last last sat? (i think) outing with sianpei, priscilla and yihua. met hann and mel at expo after that to watch Hillsong United. the music was awesome the speaker was good. wish i could say it was enough for me to start putting God first but.. i dont know. life has been so mundane. i wake up, i go to school. sometimes we'll go shopping.. ok we always go shopping. at ION especially. i currently have $300 in my bank acct.. sigh. and still intending to spend a bomb on kang jin's present.

i know.. should start saving. spend more time studying.. but i feel soo lazy. there was supposed to be class chalet this weekend but we postponed it because of the upcoming exams.. there are exams so often i really dont care anymore. ok i do care, but not as much as before. now, its just, do your work.. if you're too tired, dont do it. if you're too lazy, dont do it. if you dont make promos, its okay.. just go to poly. i have that mindset everyday.. how how how

i feel like my life is going around in circles. feels like i'm always doing the same thing, feeling the same way, experiencing the same things. i dont know if its a bad thing but i dont feel much about anything anymore. i havent cried in a long time ^^ havent felt extremely happy for a long time too.. life is just, life. haha.

i dont know how to be selfish with you.

I love that you get cold when it is 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle in your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible-when Harry met Sally