never knew i would end up talking about you.. i just read somewhere that it was important to be yourself because if you did something just to "get" someone and then change or stop trying, things wouldn't work out. i can safely say i'm better now though.. i'm a lot more secure, i trust more and i'm trying because i want to. not because i need to make myself more desirable but because i want to. you make me want to do good, to make you happy and show you that i'm good for you. i'm not going to think too hard about us or about whether we're gonna work out i'm just going to let myself be happy with you. all these lonely nights without you.. its not that bad. i know you're worth waiting for.

i don't know where to begin. if its okay to not know how to express your feelings, is it okay to not know your feelings? i don't know where to start. i don't know what to say. but if i didn't pen this down, if i didn't acknowledge the existence of my thoughts, i might just sink from the weight of these feelings. if there's one thing that hasn't changed about me and my life, it would be my capacity to feel. i still feel as much as before. in different ways, about different things. but i still feel, i still feel it all.